Tag Archives: abortion

The Tea House of Representatives: Back to the bad old days

Conservatives really hate women. Actually, they pretty much hate anyone who isn’t rich, white and male. And Christian. Preferably American. But women, public enemy number one. Even when they’re tired of bashing the queers or finding extremist Muslims under every rock or blaming Mexicans for the lack of jobs or whining about “welfare queens,” they’re never to tired to dream up new and torturous ways to screw women, literally and figuratively.

Take the Tea House of Representatives. Please. Their first order of business was, of course, to repeal health care and make sure that you paid more for less health care, that if you lose your job, and the health insurance that comes with it, and have some terminal disease, you won’t be able to get insurance again and that your kids are shit out of luck if they need insurance.

But their next order of business? Redefining rape. Yep. According to the conservative assholes in the Tea House of Representatives, it isn’t rape unless you have enough bruising and lacerations. Oh, and by the way, incest doesn’t count anymore either. And this is just in a bill that bans federal funding for abortions across the board, except for rape, of course, and provided it was “forcible” enough. No, if you are drugged by some cretin who then has sex with your drug-addled body, it is not rape.

Although I’d be willing to bet if Neil Patrick Harris drugged Rep. Chris Smith, the idiot who wrote this bill, and then had sex with his drug-addled body, Chris would be rushing to change the language in his bill. Probably to say that homosexual rape doesn’t have to be forcible. Fortunately for us, Neil wouldn’t do such a thing, and even if he were inclined to, Chris Smith, R-New Jersey, would not be in the running.

By the way, 173 Tea House Republicans have signed on to co-sponsor little Chrissie’s bill.

Of course, abortion is pretty much the top target for these Tea Housers and other conservative slime. The seem to think that all straight liberal women do is fuck and run out and get abortions, depriving them of overloading the world population even more than it already is. Personally, I’m in favor of some retroactive abortions, but that’s another post.

Anyway, they squawk about killing babies, but that’s not what it’s about at all. It’s about control. Control over women. Barefoot and pregnant. Women should be in the kitchen and not the Tea House. They use the killing babies thing to appeal to the women in their midst, because even they wouldn’t go for it if they understood what it’s really about. The poor little babies.

Personally, I’m not that fond of the idea of abortions myself. I’m never going to have to make that decision for myself, so I can’t say with certainty what I would do if I found myself with an unwanted pregnancy. If I did, it would most certainly be from rape, maybe incest. But what if it weren’t forcible enough for John Boehner?

But here’s the thing: I would prefer that abortions are never necessary, but sometimes they are. And the fucking assholes who say they aren’t have written a bill that changes the definition of rape to “forcible rape.” And that’s precisely why I would never want to see abortions banned. When men can act like human beings instead of sex-crazed animals, maybe. But until then? Fuck you, Chris Smith.

There’s even been some talk among some conservatives about repealing suffrage.

And these jackasses will stoop to anything to try to win — mainly because they know they’re fucking wrong and if they don’t cheat, it won’t happen. But they should seriously reconsider use of the “sting and heavily edited video” operations because so far it’s been an utter failure.

First there was the ACORN sting, which unfortunately wasn’t revealed to be total bullshit until far to late to save the organization. And honestly, ACORN was an easy target. It was loosely organized and really didn’t have tight enough controls on its “volunteers.” Nevertheless, the James O’Keefe video was total bullshit. As was his attempt to bug Sen. Mary Landrieu’s office. He was arrested for that one. And then his benefactor, Andrew Breitbart, ran with the Shirley Sherrod video, which, again unfortunately, was not revealed to be bullshit until the Obama administration, in its haste to kiss the ass of conservatives, had fired her. But the bullshittiness of it was revealed very quickly.

So now the conservatives are playing a tiny little video snippit that purports to show Planned Parenthood staffers helping a guy who says he’s a sex trafficker find a back alley abortion for one of his girls. SEEEEEEE EEEEEEEVVVVIIILLLLL PLLLANNNNNEEDDDDDD PPPPPAAAARRREENNNTTTHOOOODDD! Except that during the four or five days last month that these supposed sex traffickers were visiting several Planned Parenthood offices, Planned Parenthood reported the supposed sex trafficking ring. To Attorney General Eric Holder. AND they said they thought it might be a hoax, too.

Sting FAIL, big guys.

Conservatives really suck at investigative journalism, y’know. They seem to start with what they think is going on, and then they devise “stings” to make what they think is going on go on. Of course, they’re invariably wrong, too. That’s just not how it works.  Wanna know how it works?  Go check out Investigative Reporters and Editors (IRE), which is a 35-year-old non-profit dedicated to improving the quality of investigative reporting.

Hey, wait! I have an idea! Let’s “sting” IRE! We can prove they only care about liberal investigations. Or something.