So I found this really cool plugin that creates a week in review, or a month in review, or whatever … we’ll unveil how we’re gonna use it in a few days. But it also told me that I didn’t write a damn thing last week. And I’m supposed to be the prolific one.

But jeez, what was I supposed to write about? Olympia Snowe being the only Republican to vote for the Baucus crap health care bill? Well, she did make the final vote 14-9 instead of 13-10, but big freakin’ deal. The bill’s a piece of shit that ain’t gonna help anybody but the insurance companies, and frankly, my dear, I think they’ve got all the help they need. The folks who don’t have the help they need will still be needing it if this bill makes it to the president’s desk.

Couldn’t have written about Balloon Boy. Had enough of that in the newsroom. And, by the way, I called  it a hoax within minutes of the story breaking. But did anybody listen to me? Hell no. They didn’t  even listen to balloon experts who said there was no way that thing could have gotten off the ground with a kid inside, so why would they listen to me?

Then there was the “sweat lodge” incident, but Flash Silvermoon did a fine job on that one. Moral of the  story: Spirituality shouldn’t line the pockets of fake shamans any more than it should line the pockets of other religious leaders. As in, don’t give these charlatans a dime.

I could probably go on and on about the justice of the peace in Louisiana who sees nothing wrong with refusing to marry interracial couples. There is that pesky against the law thing, as in the Supreme Court said he couldn’t. In 1967. But obviously that’s not nearly as important as Keith Bardwell’s concerns for the children of such marriages. My god, they could grow up to be president or something.

Then Morehouse College, that historically black college in Atlanta, decided it would crack down on cross-dressing. Who knew it was rampant on college campuses? Oh, it’s not. William Bynum, the vice president for student services said that “we are talking about five students who are living a gay lifestyle that is leading them to dress a way we do not expect in Morehouse men.” Five students, huh? Man, tough crowd. Five out of 2,700. Better make a policy before it grows to 10. Wonder how many students walk barefoot across campus, because they banned that too.

Here’s a good one. Sarah Palin has joined LinkedIn and posted her resume online. The speaking career not working out so well? And how about those book sales? She notes that she was governor of Alaska for 2 years and 7 months, but leaves off the part about quitting. Guess that’ll come up in an interview.

The White House is having some kind of little bitch slap fest with Faux News, saying what we’ve known all along — that Faux isn’t a news organization so much as the media wing of the Republican Party. Apparently that set off Glenn Beck. What wouldn’t set off Glenn Beck? And speaking of Beck, who’s got quite a career of lying going on, what lie could he tell that his brain dead followers wouldn’t believe? Would they buy it if he said Obama is a vampire? How about if he said Obama really is Osama bin Laden?

And Rod Blagojevich. The court wouldn’t let him leave the country to be on a reality show. Enter Donald Trump. Blago on celebrity apprentice? Guess he could form a company selling favors to politicians. Or maybe just selling politicians.

I dunno. See, none of this stuff really got my juices going. But there is one little nagging thing ruminating around in the back of my head.

The economy.

See, the stock market made it over 10,000 for the first time in like 100 years, and everybody was jumping up and down about how the economy was getting better and better.

Except it’s not. The stock market is no indicator of the health of the economy. It’s only an indicator of how comfy rich people feel betting their money, and since all the rich people are doing just fine, they feel  mighty fine about betting some cash on stocks. Seriously, man, the stock market can’t get much lower. It has to come up. And besides, all the rich people’s businesses are doing much better on the bottom line now that they layed off all those employees. Labor costs are such a bummer.

Meanwhile, foreclosures keep rising. Bankruptcies keep rising. Unemployment keeps rising. The stimulus package Obama pushed through was OK, but it was seriously watered down by … hold your breath … Republicans who didn’t want to actually help anybody who needs help (see health care reform).  So the banks are bigger than ever (watch bank failure Fridays — see the small banks go under and get swallowed by a larger bank), and Goldman Sachs still rules all. Tim Geithner is still a little troll trying to make sure his buddies in the financial industry stay solvent because, you know, he’s going to want a job when his gig at the Treasury Department is up.

Oh wait. Did you hear about this one? Some morons have put up an online game surmising about how the Obama administration started disappearing conservative windbags and installing a socialist government, only to run afoul of Patriotic Americans. You get ahead by invading and conquering your neighbors, including other countries, all to defeat the evil Obama. Apparently, it’s coming from your friendly neighborhood militia followers of Glenn Beck. Although they do misspell his name.

I dunno folks. It just feels to me like we’re in a holding pattern, waiting for something to happen. But I’ll be damned if I know what that is.