So the latest news out of the Vatican concerns a gay prostitution ring organized by one of the pope’s elite group of ceremonial ushers. According to Reuters, “among four people arrested last month in the corruption probe was Angelo Balducci, a member of an elite group called ‘Gentlemen of His Holiness’, ushers who are called to serve in the Vatican’s Apostolic Palace on major occasions such as when the pope receives heads of state.”

I’m just going to put my pen down now, because the comedy writes itself. It’s too easy. As easy as a Vatican usher, apparently, but…. OK, seriously, I’m done.

“Every NOW is labeled with its date, rendering all past nows obsolete, until—later or sooner—perhaps—no, not perhaps—quite certainly: it will come.”

–Christopher Isherwood, A Single Man

My partner and I recently saw A Single Man, fashion designer-cum-film director Tom Ford’s visually rich adaptation of the Christopher Isherwood classic 1964 novel. It presents “a day in the life” of a gay middle-aged college professor who mourns for his lover, whose tragic death has nearly paralyzed him from living until the day on which the story begins.

At Christmas, I received from my sister’s redneck boyfriend a book with the helpful title, Coming Out Straight. I first thought of leaving it in the bathroom as emergency tissue paper. But, as it sat under the tree for a few days, it got me thinking: what if there was a way I could reverse the sexuality I had come to realize was part of my very being? What if I could free myself from the straitjacket – excuse me, the gayjacket (single-breasted in a smart charcoal gray three-season wool) – of our culture’s overwhelming expectations that to be straight was somehow pitiable, if not outright immoral?

One look at the handsome chap on the DVD edition of the book and I was convinced. I would become an ex-gay in 2010.

At Christmas, I received from my sister’s redneck boyfriend a book with the helpful title, Coming Out Straight. I first thought of leaving it in the bathroom as emergency tissue paper. But, as it sat under the tree for a few days, it got me thinking: what if there was a way I could reverse the sexuality I had come to realize was part of my very being? What if I could free myself from the straitjacket – excuse me, the gayjacket (single-breasted in a smart charcoal gray three-season wool) – of our culture’s overwhelming expectations that to be straight was somehow pitiable, if not outright immoral?

One look at the handsome chap on the DVD edition of the book and I was convinced. I would become an ex-gay in 2010.

Welcome to new contributor, brought via Kentucky, Chris Hemming!

I am officially middle-aged.

Welcome to new contributor, brought via Kentucky, Chris Hemming!

I am officially middle-aged.